William Morgan: "The Bright Mason"

A new book, available for download electronically, has appeared about William Morgan and the anti-Masonic aftermath of his disappearance in Batavia, New York. The Bright Mason was written by freelance journalist Robert Berry, former reporter for the State Journal-Register in Springfield, Illinois. The first chapter is available for a free look at the website www.thebrightmason.com

Your Own Skull & Bones In The Woods

The Winvian Resort in Litchfield Hills, Connecticut is secluded, very exclusive, VERY expensive, and totally unique. It is made up of nineteen completely different and very unusual custom designed cottages. Be prepared to pony up between $1400 and $1900 per night (no, that's not a misprint), but according to the amenities list, the price includes all meals, drinks, spas, use of the resorts facilities, and those all-important after dinner petit-fours. The price also includes unlimited access to a 130-variety wine cellar in the main building, a restored 1775 colonial home that features dining rooms, a brandy and cigar lounge, and an art gallery. The entire property can be rented for corporate retreats for a paltry $32,000/night.

Clearly, money must not be an object.

Fourteen architects took part in designing the singularly unique cottages. Nestled amongst the tree fort, log cabin, and the many theme-designed cottages (library, maritime, Connecticut Yankee In King Arthur's Court, and even a Coast Guard helicopter) is the Secret Society Cottage (photo above):

"A very intimate cottage, secretive and mystical in look. The interior has a mezzanine floor where the bedroom is located, under a large skylight and overlooking the tall fireplace. The living room opens into a tall porch which further lends the cottage to its theme of the Skull & Bones Society."

No surprise that the bulk of the architects who designed the Winvian cottages attended Yale.

Where's the Geronimo skull?

(Thanks to brother Bill Hosler for the tip on this story.)

Rare Prince Hall Document Acquired

The Houghton Library of Modern Books and Manuscripts at Harvard University has recently been given a Masonic membership certificate, signed by Prince Hall himself. The very rare certificate came from Harvard's W.E.B. Du Bois Institute, and is dated June 13, 1799. It is in the name of Richard P.G. Wright, and signed by Prince Hall (Worshipful Master), George Medallion (Senior Warden), Jube Hill (Junior Warden) and William Smith (Secretary).

Reproduction of the certificate is restricted and must be licensed by the Library. A detailed image of it can be seen here.

Novelist James Jones on Writing and Writers

"I do think that the quality which makes a man want to write and be read is essentially a desire for self-exposure and is masochistic. Like one of those guys who has a compulsion to take his thing out and show it on the street."

—James Jones (1921-1977), author of "From Here To Eternity"

MW Prince Hall GL of Indiana New Website

Kudos to my friends and brothers of the Most Worshipful Prince Hall Grand Lodge of Indiana for their new website.

R:.W:. Kwame Acquaah Elected Grand Master for GLofDC

Belated congratulations to Right Worshipful Kwame Acquaah, who was elected as Grand Master of the Grand Lodge of the District of Columbia in October (he won't be installed until December 13th). He is the first black Mason to be made Grand Master in a mainstream (not Prince Hall) jurisdiction of the United States. It's unfortunate he has been handed the recent dispute with New York before even entering office.

GL of New York Suspends Amity With GL of District of Columbia

According to a message posted elsewhere by Right Worshipful Jay D. Marksheid, Grand Director of Ceremonies of the Grand Lodge of New York, a dispute has arisen between grand lodges in New York and Washington DC that has ramifications for members of those grand lodges.

According to brother Marksheid's post, as of November 5th, 2008, by order of Most Worshipful Edward Gilbert, Grand Master of Masons in the State of New York, F&AM, amity between the Grand Lodge of NY, F&AM and the Grand Lodge of the District of Columbia has been officially suspended. 
 
According to the order, the Grand Lodge of DC first issued a charter for a new Lodge in a territory already under the jurisdictions of the GLofNY and GL of Scotland without first obtaining their permission to do so. Further, the charter was issued in the name of several Masons who are under formal suspension from the GLofNY.  According to the GLofNY, both actions run afoul of rules of the Conference of Grand Masters of North America, and of generally recognized Masonic jurisprudence.
 
At this time, members of the GLofNY may not visit Lodges of the GlofDC nor hold Masonic intercourse with members of the GLodDC, nor permit them to visit tyled NY Lodges.

The dispute regards New York and Scotland's existing lodges in Lebanon and the GLofDC's chartering this year of a new lodge there without first establishing a treaty with New York and Scotland. There currently is no grand lodge of Lebanon, but lodges chartered by both Scotland and New York have coexisted there for decades. The GLofDC has a large Lebanese membership, and granted dispensation to L'Hiram Lodge last year, officially issuing its charter on October 25th at their annual communication.

Other grand lodges will undoubtedly pile on to the dispute to support New York.

Tuesday Nov. 4: Anniversary of Washington's Initiation

“Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company."
—G. Washington

Tuesday will be the 256th anniversary of George Washington’s initiation as a Freemason.

Washington was initiated as an Entered Apprentice on November 4, 1752 in Fredericksburg Lodge No. 4, Fredericksburg, Virginia, with four other brethren.

Looking for a Lodge Goat?

The winner of the Most Beautiful Goat title, during the Mazayen al-Maaz goat beauty pageant competition in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia.

Kenneth W. Davis Elected as Master of Vitruvian No. 767

Slightly belated congratulations to Brother Kenneth W. Davis who was elected to serve as Worshipful Master of Lodge Vitruvian No. 767 at our meeting on Tuesday night. Dr. Ken Davis is an author, as well as a professor and former chair of English at Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis and president of Komei, Inc., a global training and consulting firm. He is married to the lovely Bette Davis.

Dinner followed at the always wonderful Capri Restaurant, and I was honored to present a reading of an appropriately scary Halloween story with a Masonic connection, H. G. Wells' "The Inexperienced Ghost," first published in The Stand in 1902.

Boo.

Thanks, Century No. 764

Many thanks to the brethren of Century Lodge No. 764 in Indianapolis for their kind invitation to speak to their homecoming dinner last night at Broadmoor Country Club. The food was excellent, and the fellowship was even better.

Century was established in 1998 and was chartered in 2000 so as to be the first new lodge in Indiana to be chartered in the new century—hence the name. It was formed to break the mold of the cookie-cutter lodge in Indiana, and pioneered the use of innovations that seem more commonplace now, but that shocked and appalled the established methods for stated meetings (executive business meetings separate from the monthly stated meeting; actually having a quality dinner out at fine restaurants instead of suspicious cold cuts on paper plates; insisting on a dress code; and more). Without Century, our own Vitruvian No. 767 would have had a tougher time breaking the established mold in Indiana.

Thanks especially to my friend and brother Carson Smith, Century's Senior Warden, for suggesting me as their speaker.

Oldest Hebrew Writing Discovered From Era of King David

The ancient Hebrew fortified city of Khirbet Qeiyafa, or Elah Fortress, was the Biblical site where the legendary battle between David and Goliath took place. Now, archeologists exploring the area have unearthed what may be the oldest known example of Hebrew writing ever found. A 3,000 year old pottery shard has been discovered by a Hebrew University team (actually, by a teenaged volunteer), that predates the Dead Sea Scrolls by 1,000 years. According to a BBC article, the characters are written in a precurser to the Hebrew alphabet, known as proto-Canaanite.

So far, words deciphered on the shard include judge, slave and king, along with a three-letter verb meaning "to do," which seems to peg the words as Hebrew. It is the longest proto-Canaanite text ever found.

Lead archeologist Yosef Garfinkel says the artifact sheds important light on the period of the reign of King David.

"The chronology and geography of Khirbet Qeiyafa create a unique meeting point between the mythology, history, historiography and archaeology of King David."

After slaying the Philistine giant Goliath, David would go on to become the second king (after Saul) of a united kingdom of Israel, and was the father of King Solomon. There is little archeological evidence of King David's reign (or existence), so this find may be significant in filling in gaps in the historic record.

iPhone: No Se Habla Español

So somebody at Apple or the NEW! AT&T tripped over a piece of equipment deep in the subterranean depths of the Home Office at 7:30 this morning and now all of the iPhones in America have voice mail that answers in Spanish.

And when I called the NEW! AT&T, their phone number recognition system wasn't working today, either.

Sounds remarkably like the OLD AT&T. The story is that "technicians" are "working" on it.

No Dan Brown, No "Solomon Key": Doubleday Cuts Staff

Depending on whom you ask, Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code was either the eighth or the sixth most popular book in the English language. And then he went and blabbed to everyone who the sequel would be about (the Freemasons) and where the sequel would be set (Washington DC), and even the title (The Solomon Key). And then he didn't write it for five years. While I wouldn't know how to face the keyboard when confronted with such a challenge, he of course has, like, a brazillion dollars to lubricate his writer's block.

But he hasn't finished it yet, apparently. And his publisher and the book chains see no hope for themselves without a new Dan Brown (or a J.K. Rowling, for that matter) mega-seller to save them from certain doom. It seems that Doubleday can wait no longer, and announced that it is laying off 10% of its workforce.

Doubleday spokesman David Drake said in the NY Times,

...the decision was not related to the delay in the delivery of the next novel by Dan Brown, the author of The Da Vinci Code, the blockbuster best seller published in 2003. Back in 2004, Doubleday said the target release date for the next book was 2005, but Mr. Brown has yet to deliver a manuscript. Sales from even a single title — if it is as significant as The Da Vinci Code — can make a substantial difference to a publisher’s sales.

Nevertheless, "the changes we've made are quite separate from anything to do with Dan Brown," Mr. Drake said.

No pressure there, Mr. Brown. Really. None at all. But in the meantime, somebody better hide the razor blades and barbiturates in the Doubleday executive washroom.

Plunger Boy No Longer

It's true.

As of Tuesday at 3:00PM, Alice and I have officially turned in our plungers and master keys, and sold our apartment complex. I am no longer a greedy, mustache-twilrling, baby-eating landlord. In fact, I can say with a great deal of relief, I am now unemployed.

King Solomon's Mines Discovered?

I haven't been enamored with CNN's reportage for quite some time, but today they are reporting that researchers may have discovered the fabled King Solomon's Mines.

See here.

Thomas Levy of the University of California San Diego, who led the research, said carbon dating placed copper production at Khirbat en-Nahas (Arabic for 'Ruins of copper") in the 10th century -- in line with the biblical narrative of Solomon's rule.

"We can't believe everything ancient writings tell us," Levy said in a university statement. "But this research represents a confluence between the archaeological and scientific data and the Bible."

Calling Allan Quatermain.

Broad Ripple Lodge Chili Cookoff Wrapup

The 8th annual Broad Ripple Lodge No. 643 Chili Cookoff is now little more than a faded orange grease spot in history.

While skunked for the eighth year of the ever elusive honor of having my name inscribed on the suitably bilious Scarlet Pepper Cup and the year's bragging rights that accompany it, I will say that Chili For Dummies, nailing down the "Best Presentation" and "It Wasn't Chili But I Liked It" categories, as well as battling it out to a hotly contested tie for Second Place, proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that another Hodapp creation once again both delighted the public and confounded the critics. With a possible lesson about style over substance.

Many, many thanks to all who came out (45 folks at one point as I looked around the room, and more outside), to the 19 folks who lined up at the Indiana Blood Center Bloodmobile to get jabbed (exceeding our quota!), and especially to the chili chefs who whipped up their robust entries. A tip of the hat to Alan Hague of the Broad Ripple Gazette for stopping by—a gent who works tirelessly without nearly enough kudos for all he does for the Village.

And a laurel and hardy handshake to Brother Michael Walkup for his First Place entry, "Mmmm Chili", which we will undoubtedly hear about for the next year.

Even if he did bring his Mom along for the sentimentality vote.

And even if he did put chocolate in his "chili" to assure all the women would be mesmerized by a chocolate buzz at voting time.

Oct. 25th - The Feast of Sts. Crispin & Crispinian

Today is the long forgotten Feast of Sts. Crispin and Crispinian, Roman twins said to have been martyred for their Christian faith in 286AD.

Shakespeare's Henry V (1599) contains one of the most famous passages on medieval honor and leadership, which coined the term "band of brothers", on the day before battle on Sts. Crispin's Day.

Enter the KING

WESTMORELAND. O that we now had here
But one ten thousand of those men in England
That do no work to-day!

KING. What's he that wishes so?
My cousin Westmoreland? No, my fair cousin;
If we are mark'd to die, we are enow
To do our country loss; and if to live,
The fewer men, the greater share of honour.
God's will! I pray thee, wish not one man more.
By Jove, I am not covetous for gold,
Nor care I who doth feed upon my cost;
It yearns me not if men my garments wear;
Such outward things dwell not in my desires.
But if it be a sin to covet honour,
I am the most offending soul alive.
No, faith, my coz, wish not a man from England.
God's peace! I would not lose so great an honour
As one man more methinks would share from me
For the best hope I have. O, do not wish one more!
Rather proclaim it, Westmoreland, through my host,
That he which hath no stomach to this fight,
Let him depart; his passport shall be made,
And crowns for convoy put into his purse;
We would not die in that man's company
That fears his fellowship to die with us.
This day is call'd the feast of Crispian.
He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,
Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam'd,
And rouse him at the name of Crispian.
He that shall live this day, and see old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,
And say 'To-morrow is Saint Crispian.'
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,
And say 'These wounds I had on Crispian's day.'
Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember, with advantages,
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words-
Harry the King, Bedford and Exeter,
Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester-
Be in their flowing cups freshly rememb'red.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered-
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in England now-a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.

Buried Treasure! Masonic Geocaching

Looking for hidden treasure? Folks around the world doing just that in one of the fastest growing pastimes. It's called geocaching.

Think of geocaching as a giant, hi-tech treasure hunt. Players use a Global Positioning System (GPS) system to "bury" and find containers (called "geocaches" or "caches") all around the world. The geocache itself is usually a small watertight container with a logbook and some kind of treasure (usually a coin, toy or some other small collectable trinket - often referred to as geoswag). The container can be as simple as a plastic 35mm film container, or as complex as a hand-made box.

Since September of 2000, geocaching has grown from 75 caches to over 670,000 active caches worldwide, with between 2 and 3 million participants.

To see where geocaches are hidden in your neighborhood, go to http://www.geocaching.com/

On November 1st, the first Masonic Geocaching Society meeting will be held in Washington DC at the Scottish Rite House of the Temple. Addressing the meeting will be author Dr. S. Brent Morris, who will speak about codes and ciphers (Brent argues that Masons were arguably the first geocachers—when Enoch and Mathuselah buried a golden plate with the ineffable name of God upon it, and buried it deep beneath the foundation of the temple). The event sign in will be at 10AM, Brent will speak at 11AM, and there will be prize drawings at 1PM.

For more information, contact Dean Alban at dalban@scottishrite.org

Broad Ripple Lodge Chili Cook Off & Blood Drive This Saturday 10/25

From the brethren of Broad Ripple Lodge No. 643 in Indianapolis:

The date of the Annual Broad Ripple Lodge Chili Cook-Off is quickly approaching. Slip into the kitchen, hunker down over the stove and whip up a batch of your favorite culinary disaster. The event is scheduled for Saturday the 25th of October with our doors to open at 5:00 PM and the contest to run from 6:00 PM to 9:00 PM. Those intending to take a shot at the top should arrive closer to 5:00 PM. Prizes will be awarded in numerous categories beyond simply the best overall. For many, the coveted red pepper trophy and bragging rights alone will be reward enough.

The Lodge will provide corn bread, mac n' cheese, and hot dogs to accompany the various concoctions along with all the usual fixins'. A basket will be set out to collect donations intended to assist the Lodge in defraying its' expenses and to bolster the Masonic Angel Fund which will surely be tested by need as Fall gives way to Winter and the holidays approach.

Additionally, representatives from the Indiana Blood Center will be on hand from 5:00 PM to 9:00 PM seeking donations of much needed blood. Anyone able is encouraged to lend an arm and everyone who does will be entered into a drawing for a $100.00 Best Buy gift card. This is your chance to possibly help save a life and win a little something in the bargain.

This is an open to the public event and all are welcome to take part in the voting and the competition as well. So bring your family, friends or a prospective candidate and join us for what promises to be another fine evening of food and fellowship at Broadripple. Those planning on attending, and especially those wishing to offer up an entry for consideration, are asked to contact me so that we might adequately prepare for all our guests.

Miles Evanston, SW
Broadripple Lodge #643
rmevanston@hotmail.com

Lodge Vitruvian No. 767 Meeting and Festive Board 10/28/08

If you are a Master Mason in the Indianapolis area next Tuesday night, October 28th, please join us at Lodge Vitruvian No. 767 for our October Stated Meeting. You will have to suffer through our annual elections, true, but we will as quickly as possible retire to Capri Restaurant for our festive board.

I will have the honor of speaking at dinner, when I will present a very special Masonic Halloween story.

Lodge meets at 7:00PM at the temple of Broad Ripple Lodge No. 643 at 1716 Broad Ripple Avenue, on Indianapolis' north side.

Tuxes for officers and members, business attire for visitors. Dinner is $30.

Please no Obama or McCain Halloween masks.

Globes and Masons and Prisoners of War

An article in today's Burton Mail announces that two historic globes will soon be auctioned in England.

"Historic" would be an understatement.

The globes were owned by the Royal Sussex Masonic Lodge No. 353, and their heritage is surprising. The members of Royal Sussex Lodge are merely their most recent owners—they were acquired by them in 1817.

According to works by Brother John T. Thorp, during the ongoing battles between Britain and France that lasted from the 1740s, on up through the Napoleonic Wars from 1793 until 1814, French prisoners of war were held in Britain. Between 1803 and 1814, no less than 120,000 French soldiers and sailors were imprisoned in towns across England. It was a very different time and place, then. POW officers signed a "parole", which was an agreement, on their honor, not to try to communicate with or escape back to their country. In return, they received a great measure of freedom, at least in England. Officers were paid a minimal amount to provide for food and separate lodging, and could actually go out and find work, or even start a business.

French prisoners brought their Freemasonry with them, and were allowed to form lodges in towns where there were none meeting. According to an article in the January 2006 MQ Magazine, almost fifty such French lodges sprung up in these POW towns, under the authority of the Antients Grand Lodge (prior to 1813 unification with the "Moderns"). In the town of Ashby, such a lodge was formed, Loge Des Vrais Amis de l’Odre Ashby-de-la- Zouch (Lodge of True Friends of the Order).

According to the article in the UK papers, the French Masons had the globes for their lodge created by George Adams, of Charing Cross, London, considered to be the most important globe maker of the 18th Century (he made globes for Captain Cook). However, Yasha Beresiner's paper Masonic Globes claims the globes were actually made by Dudley Adams.

Royal Sussex' first master was WBro. George Mugliston, a Frenchman living in England who had previously visited Loge Des Vrais Amis de l’Odre, bought them (or otherwise snagged them) from the French in 1817. The wooden stands, pained gold, were built by the prisoners. The globes are expected to fetch at auction between $30,000 and $40,000.

For more about Freemasonry among prisoners, see:
French prisoners' lodges: A brief account of fifty lodges and chapters of freemasons, established and conducted by French prisoners of war in England and elsewhere, between 1756 and 1814 by John T. Thorp

Behind The Wire by Keith Flynn

Meet The Press

"The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers."
Thomas Jefferson

I love the brethren of Madison Lodge No. 44, which sits about 20 miles northeast of the outer ring of Indianapolis' I-465. I like the quaint town of Pendleton, which has a darling downtown—my wife's cousin lives there. I like Wbro. Robert Himes, this year's Master of Madison Lodge No. 44. Heck, I even like their building, which was built 20 years ago after they sold their downtown lodge. And I'm proud of them that they were able to get an article about themselves into the Herald Bulletin, which is based up the road in Anderson.

But is this not the worst article you've ever read? Or at least the Miss Congeniality to the worst article you've ever read, which allows it to assume the tasks of the worst article you've ever read, should it be unable to perform those duties?

I-69 (Exit 19) Masonic lodge keeps history alive in new building

PENDLETON — For most of its 166-year history, members of Madison Lodge 44 held regular meetings in downtown Pendleton. But in 1989, the group moved to a brand new building west of town near Exit 19 to take advantage of the open space and better access to the interstate.

Robert Himes, a 37-year Mason and lifelong area resident, said future development at the exit should help, not hurt, his organization and area residents “as long as it’s done properly.”

Instead of more antique stores and gift shops, he’d like to see nicer restaurants open on that end of Madison County. The fast-food restaurants and subdivisions don’t concern him yet, but he would like to see more upscale businesses that offer a greater variety of services.

“I guess you can’t argue with progress,” he said.

Himes, who wears a leather cell phone case on his belt showing the emblem of the Free Masons, said his lodge is the oldest order of Freemasons in Madison County. The group has helped start 10 more lodges in the county.

Membership at the lodge is holding at 200, Himes said, down from about 400 in 1980. Despite the declining numbers, the group continues to meet monthly.

A nineteen year old building described as new? The Master of Pendleton's oldest, best-known gentleman's fraternity, with a legendary heritage and a mythic past, being asked about strip center development? Sterling powers of observation and in-depth reportage brought to bear, only to discover that Hines wears a cellphone holster with a square and compasses on it? And one of the most in-apropos and non-sequitureous closing lines ever written? As though if they drop to 199 they'll have to chuck in their charter and go join the Elks?

I'm shaking my head over this because it is the only daily newspaper cage liner I have had at my disposal to advertise my business in for six and a half years. Each year the ad price skyrockets, the quality plummets, and the subscribers vanish.

And the articles apparently don't even have authors anymore.

The Bavarian Illuminati

Researchers seriously interested in the history, philosophy, activities and social phenomenon of the 18th century Bavarian Illuminati—at least in the English speaking world—have long been frustrated by the dearth of material about the Order that could be trusted. It says much that the overwhelmingly cited sources of information about Adam Weishaupt's secret society all have their own agendas to flog. Abbé Augustin Barruel's Memoirs Illustrating the History of Jacobinism sought to identify the Templars, the Freemasons and the Illuminati as the nefarious architects of the atheistic French Revolution. Sources like the Catholic Encyclopedia, not surprisingly, stress the anti-clerical, anti-Jesuit aspects, while Nesta Webster modernized and enlarged the conspiracy theory genre, with the Illuminati at the center. And John Robison's Proofs of a Conspiracy asserted that it was evil, European, Grand Orient style, irregular, non-Anglo Saxon Freemasonry that was trying to do nefarious and dirty dealings to the Church and Europe's monarchs, and NOT the virtuous Freemasonry that was flourishing in Old Blighty.

The challenge in seeking the details about the Bavarian order is to separate the verifiable from the daffy, and the true historian from the perennially nervous. The tireless Trevor McKeown on the Grand Lodge of British Columbia & Yukon website has an outstanding online article on the Bavarian Illuminati, as does author Terry Melanson at the Illuminati Conspiracy Archive. Melanson has expanded his research into a book, available in November, called Perfectibilists: The 18th Century Bavarian Order of the Illuminati. Conrad Goeringer on the American Atheists site also has a good article, The Enlightenment, Freemasonry, and The Illuminati.

A few months ago, I lamented on The Masonic Society forum that, while Weishaupt wrote several works about the Illuminati, which were subsequently published by the Bavarian government to expose the secret revolutionary activities of the Order, there is no English translation of them. This seems like a glaring gap in knowledge for researchers who can't speak German, and frankly astonishing in the wake of Dan Brown's silly but hugely popular Angels & Demons, in which an absurd representation of the Illuminati is presented. Perhaps as the movie version of the book comes to theaters in the spring, maybe some enterprising publisher or German student will remedy this.

In the meantime, Terry Melanson seems to have started to answer the call. In September, he started the website Bavarian Illuminati: Home of the Original Writings of the illuminati. So far he has posted the first part of Some Original Writings Of The Order of the Illuminati, found during a search of former Court Councillor Xavier von Zwack, who was the second in command of the Order at the time of its dissolution by Bavarian authorities. Melanson explains that he is actually working from a French translation, and the works comprise hundreds of pages, so expect slow-going (and perhaps burnout before its completion). He is to be commended for taking up the task. For a group that has had so much legend heaped upon it, and untold fears of its supposed ongoing influence in the world, it's astonishing that it has taken more than two centuries for these documents to slowly start trickling out to a wider audience.

October 16, 1646: Elias Ashmole

On this date in 1646, English antiquarian Elias Ashmole recorded the following in his personal diary:

1646, Oct. 16, 4.30 P.M. - I was made a Free Mason at Warrington in Lancashire with Coll: Henry Mainwaring of Karincham in Cheshire; the names of those that were then of the Lodge, Mr Rich. Penket Worden, Mr James Collier, Mr Rich. Sankey, Henry Littler, John Ellam, Rich. Ellam & Hugh Brewer.

Ashmole's is the first known, recorded initiation of a non-operative, speculative Freemason (although there is evidence that Robert Moray may actually have held that distinction, in 1641). Both men went on to become members of The Royal Society.

Prosecution Calls God To The Stand

A Nebraska judge has ruled that God cannot be sued for damages caused by pesky, albeit destructive, Acts of God, primarily because you can't serve Him with a subpoena.

From today's Omaha World-Herald:

Judge Marlon Polk threw out Nebraska Sen. Ernie Chambers' lawsuit against the Almighty, saying there was no evidence that the defendant had been served. What's more, Polk found "there can never be service effectuated on the named defendant."

Chambers had sued God in September 2007, seeking a permanent injunction to prevent God from committing acts of violence such as earthquakes and tornadoes.

Although the case may seem superfluous and even scandalous to others, Chambers has said his point is to focus on the question of whether certain lawsuits should be prohibited.

"Nobody should stand at the courthouse door to predetermine who has access to the courts," he said. "My point is that anyone can sue anyone else, even God."

Chambers, an avowed atheist, said he decided to make that point after at least two attempts in the Nebraska Legislature to limit "frivolous lawsuits."

I always wanted to play a movie judge. I've been practicing the lines for decade.

"One more outburst like this and i'll clear thus courtroom!"

The Ancient and Honorable Order of E Clampus Vitus

The New York Times has a piece today about the Ancient and Honorable Order of E Clampus Vitus.

Never heard of this noble fraternal group? From the book I wrote with Alice Von Kannon, Conspiracy Theories & Secret Societies For Dummies:

Because of the wild popularity of secret societies – especially the Freemasons and the Odd Fellows – in the 1800’s, it was inevitable that parody groups would arise. One such group was E Clampus Vitus, a Latin name that meant, well, absolutely nothing. It isn’t even real Latin. The group’s motto, the Credo Quia Absurdium, gives a clue as to its ultimate goal: take nothing seriously unless it is absurd.

In 1848, there were just 2,000 people in California. After the discovery of gold at Sutter’s Mills in 1849, 53,000 greed-crazed ‘49ers poured into the territory within just one year. Many from the East were looking for, or founded, fraternal lodges like they had back home. Others decided on a different path for their fraternalism.

E Clampus Vitus seems to have been brought to the California Gold Rush village of Hangtown (now more delicately called Placerville) by Joseph H. Zumwalt from Virginia in 1850. Zumwalt founded the first “lodge” in Mokelumne Hill, and the group quickly spread throughout Western mining towns and camps. Members were called Clampers, or Clamperers, depending on whom you ask, and the head of the organization was the Sublime Noble Grand Humbug. Officers included the Grand Iscutis, the Grand Gyascutis, the Clamps Petrix, the Clamps Matrix, and the Royal Platrix. Their “secret” sign of recognition was to extend the palms vertically, facing out on either side of the head, stick the thumbs in each ear, madly waggling their fingers. They would occasionally march in parades with the other fraternal organizations, carrying their banner – a ladies hoop skirt, festooned with the message, “This is the flag we fight under.”

Meetings were held in “Halls of Comparative Libations” (saloons). The initiation ceremony was essentially designed to give far more enjoyment to the members of the club than to the new candidate, and involved the sort of serious horseplay that only a crowd of drunken miners tormenting a poor dope in a blindfold could cook up. Hauled in “The Expungent’s Chair” (a wheelbarrow full of wet sponges) across the rungs of a ladder on the floor, the candidate “crossed the rugged road to Dublin.” He was often tossed onto a saddle that was attached to ropes looped over ceiling rafters for the ride of his life. And sometimes lack of imagination simply knocked him in the head and flattened him into a pile of horse dung. The point was to make it so raucous and unpleasant that the new recruit would keep the tradition alive, if only to seek revenge on the next initiate.
E Clampus Vitus thrived until the 1890’s and the death of the mining towns. It seemed to be completely gone from the West by 1916.

In 1931, the order was revived by Dr. Charles Lewis Camp and members of the California Historical Society, and became devoted to preserving the lore of Western history – a strange turnaround of a completely ridiculous group becoming a serious one. Commemorative plaques installed by the Order can be found on buildings of noteworthy status (frequently having to do with alcohol) all across the West.

Grand Lodge of West Virginia Meets Today, Tomorrow

It will be interesting to read what transpires.

Winamac, Indiana 10/14/08

My last visit to Winamac Lodge in 2007.

Tomorrow night, Tuesday Oct. 14th, I'll be in Winamac, Indiana speaking to the brethren of Winamac Lodge No. 262. Dinner begins at 6:30PM and the meeting is at 7:30PM. If you are in northwestl Indiana, drop by.

701 Years Ago

Today is the 701st anniversary of the arrest of the Knights Templar.

If you haven't been to your Commandery in a while and they are meeting tonight, consider going and reminding your fellow Sir Knights of the date, the event, and their legendary forbearers.

I'm a little behind on the news, but the Scottish Rite Southern Jurisdiction's library at Washington DC's House of the Temple has, in addition to the Grand Lodge of New York's Livingston Library, obtained a copy of the Processus Contra Templarios—Papal Inquiry into the Trial of the Templars, a facsimile of the documents of the Vatican's probe into the charges of heresy brought against the knights. One of only 799 copies printed by the Vatican's Secret Archives, the $8,000 book is now available in both of these Masonic libraries for study by researchers.

The book contains the "Chinon Parchment," a recently re-discovered document that exonerated the Knights of heresy after an investigation by Pope Clement V.